What Makes a Good Man

A good man can be hard to find, and if you have one in your life that does everything listed here – keep him around!

1. He has eyes only for you

A good man will make you feel like the only woman in the world and will make you believe that every little thing about you is exactly what he wants in a woman.

2. He trusts you

Yes, you need to be able to trust him, too, but if he is confident about your relationship and does not feel the need to question your thoughts and actions, it will likely make you feel the same way towards him. If he is suspicious of you, it may make you feel as though you should be suspicious of him, too.

3. He is the same no matter who he is around

Of course, most men are going to talk to their guy friends a little differently than their grandma – anyone would. But what is important is that they do not pretend to be someone they are not, just to fit in with who they are around. You should see consistency in his characteristics when he is with different people. For example, if he truly has a big heart, you will see it no matter who is around.

4. He is fun to be with

Back when I was dating, my mom used to ask, “Does he make you laugh?” It does not seem like it would be that important, but you should be with someone you can have fun with and one that keeps you from taking life too seriously. Personal note: I tend to be a very serious person and my husband helps me to be more light-hearted in life!

5. He is ambitious

You want a man who is always reaching for new goals (and meeting at least some of them). If he is content with things in life just because he does not want to put forth the effort it takes to achieve more, he may feel the same way about a relationship. Goals are important in every aspect of life – relationships included. 

6. He has the same interests as you

Sure, opposites attract and it is a good thing to be with someone who encourages you to step out of your comfort zone, but it is important to feel like you can escape back to your safe place sometimes, too. When there are no common interests, you may feel like you cannot do the things you want to do without the other person feeling bored or uncomfortable. If you are interested in the same things, you will both enjoy doing the same things rather than one always sacrificing their wants and needs to please the other.

7. He wants the same things in life

This one is similar to #6, only I am now referring to bigger topics such as where you see yourself living in the years to come, future children (or no children), etc., and values. These things are important for couples to feel the same about and could make it difficult to continue a healthy relationship if they are not agreed upon.

8. He listens

I know it sounds crazy, but men actually do hear you (well, sometimes). He is definitely going to just nod and give you some mhmms when you’re telling him about how aesthetic your Instagram story is but he will hear the things you need him to hear. Sometimes you won’t know he was listening until he brings it up days later, which always surprises me! Also, if the aesthetics of your Instagram story really ARE that important to you, he will know that and will pay attention when you talk about it – yes, personal experience. 😉

9. He surprises you

You have heard of the five love languages, right? Well, this one could have a little different meaning for you based on your love language. Everyone likes to be given things, but it does not necessarily mean to be given gifts (although that is one of the languages). A good man will surprise you with whatever is meaningful to you whether it is a gift, compliment, act of service, quality time together, or physical touch (kiss, hug, etc).

10. He supports you

This one can mean a number of things. A good man will want what is best for you and that means helping you reach your goals and dreams. Supporting you could also mean that he helps you when you ask for it and offers you help even when you do not ask. It is also important that he offers advice when needed and stands by you in your decisions.

If you have found a good man, I am so happy for you! If you have not yet found one, I promise there is one out there for you and whatever you do, do not give up on finding one and do not settle for less than what you deserve. Also, relationships are a two-way street. You, too, have to be a good woman who offers all of the same things above. You get back what you put in!